Another Bullet in the Chess Board
Written & copyrighted by Peter Conolly, with special words for SchemingMind.com by Topher Gayle (aka surfnsuds). Performed by Briarwood.
Download the MP3 file here, buy Briarwood's CD here.
I was looking for a soulmate
She was looking for a checkmate
We were locked in combat, our pawns and rooks advancing inexorably
Then she forked me with her horsie
Her strategy was never clear
In desperation, I let her defrock my bishop
By the time I saw her plan the end was near.
Put another bullet in the chessboard
I can't stand to lose another game, you see
Put my PC out of its misery
For this is what SchemingMind has done to me
Put another bullet in the chessboard
Use a barstool, use a brick, just stop this thing
My Glicko rating is shrinking rapidly
Every time I see her win
We were playing fianchetto
She was singing the libretto from Rigoletto
She beat me in kriegspiel, crazyhouse, all queens, random, atomic and upside-down
I was gettin' tired of losin'
But maybe, losing, I could win!
I challenged her to a game of losers
When she thrashed me at that I could only sing:
Put another bullet in the chessboard
I can't stand to lose another game, you see
Put my PC out of its misery
For this is what SchemingMind has done to me
Put another bullet in the chessboard
Use a barstool, use a brick, just stop this thing
My Glicko rating is shrinking rapidly
Every time I see her win